Lady Blackjack
by Balin Lord of Moria
Summary: Even the female blackjack dealer in Lost Wages' Casino Hotel attracts dopey old Larry Laffer, but although he can't have her, she has something he can remember her by. Something that fits the leisure-suited swinger just fine. Rated T for a little sexual content, but nothing explicit or mature here, NO LEMON OR LIME.


**Warning!: **There are a few references to nudity, and a little bit of something resembling sexual innuendo, but I _think_ that it's appropriate enough for the T rating. If not, please let me know, but I think it is.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own _Leisure Suit Larry_; Sierra Inc. owns it and Al Lowe created it.

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_**Lady Blackjack**_

"That hooker sure was good in bed," Larry Laffer thought, "but it just isn't right paying a seedy woman for sex when you're looking for commitment. But I need more money to get the things I need to woo a girl, and my money is getting low. So that means, off to the Casino Hotel!"

So the middle-aged ex-virgin in the out-of-date white leisure suit hopped in a dingy old taxicab and rode to his destination, the top hotel casino in Lost Wages. He walked inside and looked around. The place certainly was hopping with people who were looking to win big money; some of them were at card tables on one side of the main casino room, while others were trying out the numerous slot machines on the other side. Larry decided that he wanted to play a slightly social version of gambling, and ambled over to one of the Blackjack tables on his left.

A slim, attractive, black-haired young woman in a casino uniform stood behind the table as the dealer. She smiled and said, "Would you like to try your luck at Blackjack tonight, mister?"

"I sure would, babe," said Larry enthusiastically.

The dealer blushed, but smiled pleasantly again, and began to set up the game. "Then let's go, then!"

Leisure Suit Larry Laffer was by no means an expert card shark (he had lived in his mother's basement for such a long time with childish things), but he knew the basics of how to play Blackjack, and soon he was having fun playing. Blackjack was actually one of the easier gambling games for Larry to play, anyway. He wasn't very good with strategy, though; he just did his best to judge when to Stand, and when to say, "Hit me." He usually didn't Split when playing this game, but when he was feeling lucky, he would use Double Down, too, or he would use Surrender when not feeling so lucky.

During one of the more commonly encountered hands, Larry got a King of Hearts and a Five of Diamonds, while the dealer's revealed card was a Nine of Diamonds. Though not known for his genius, Larry at least knew the basics of how to strategize at gambling, and said, "Hit me." He got an Eight of Hearts and was Busted. He lost a little bit of money. Next, he got an Ace of Hearts and an Eight of Hearts, and the dealer's visible card was a Six of Diamonds. He knew that in this case, it was a good idea to Double Down. So he did. He got a Three of Diamonds, making his score 12. But then the dealer revealed a Ten of Diamonds, and then was Hit by an Eight of Diamonds, and she got Busted. Larry won twice as much as he had bet.

And so the evening continued, as well as the card playing. In one hand, the dealer got a Blackjack, making Larry the lovable loser lose again. Then, in another hand, Larry received an Ace of Hearts and a Nine of Clubs, and stood at 20 points. The dealer had a Ten of Diamonds, a Four of Diamonds, and Hit a Five of Spades, rounding out at 19 points. Larry won that time!

"This must be your lucky night, sir," said the dealer, "You're sure racking up a lot of money."

"Whether I'm lucky tonight or not still remains to be seen, my lady," said Larry, "But you're sure right about the money. I could buy my own new leather wallet with this money."

"Don't you worry, mister," said she, "Almost everyone walks out of here a winner at some time or another."

"Good," said Larry, "Now I feel as confident as a cowboy with his cowgirl riding him!"

Larry soon won again with a King of Diamonds and a Queen of Diamonds against the dealer's Five of Diamonds, Four of Spades, and her Hit King of Spades. 20 to 19 points. Then the dealer beat him with a King of Diamonds and a hidden Two of Clubs, along with a Hit Six of Diamonds, against Larry's Ace of Clubs, Six of Hearts, and Hit King of Diamonds. 18 to 17 points.

Being the ladies' man that he was (or thought he was), Larry would take occasional moments to stare at the feminine dealer standing before him. If she looked that beautiful with her glasses on, she must have been dazzling without them on. He asked her what her name was.

"I'm Veronica," she said happily, "Veronica Woodbury."

"Oh, okay," Larry responded, surprised that she didn't have a sexier name, or at least a sexier last name. As he often did when seeing a fully-clothed beautiful woman, he began to envision Veronica the dealer entirely naked before him. He was hoping that she would embrace him in the daydream and give him what he desired. She was so serious and yet so lovely. But in his vision, he only saw her putting a look of shock on her face, and she clung to her chest and crotch with her hands, feeling very awkward and embarrassed. "No!" thought Larry to himself, "That's not the way it's supposed to be! She's supposed to be open with me in my dream! I would never let her cover herself like that!"

"Uh, mister," she interrupted his thoughts, "you're spacing out. And you just got a blackjack. You've won a lot of money."

"Oh, yeah," said Larry, "Thanks, Veronica, babe."

"You're welcome, sir," she said. "Say," she said all of a sudden, "What's your name?"

Surprised, Larry introduced himself, "My name is Larry. Larry Laffer."

She laughed melodically and said, "You're that new swinger I heard about in Lost Wages. You're looking for the right girlfriend, aren't you?"

"Y-Yes, I am," he said, surprised again. "Have there been rumors going around about me or something?"

"There sure have, Larry," she said. "Hey, look. I'm afraid I can't be your soul mate, because I'm happily married with a baby girl. But I knew what you were thinking when you were looking at me through glazed eyes, and I want to give you a little parting gift, even though we might be reunited later this evening, like you said."

She felt inside her pocket and pulled out an envelope full of photos. "You might like to look at these sometimes, if you're feeling lonely for some physical attention. You see," she whispered, "my family and I are nudists, and we keep plenty of pictures of ourselves around the house and in photo albums. My husband doesn't mind if some other people see me in all my glory on occasion, so I thought you could use these to enjoy yourself on a lonely afternoon or evening."

Larry, astonished, discreetly looked at a few of the photos, and soon realized that he had been wrong to envision her embarrassed about her body. "Thanks, Veronica. I'll be keeping these for a long time, if someone doesn't steal them from me."

"I'm sure you will, my boy," she said playfully.

They played for a little while longer. Larry finally won a Blackjack of his own, eventually. They also had a Push when they both won 17 points in a hand. Larry soon became a little more lucky when he won a hand with two Kings of Spades and Diamonds, at score 20, while the dealer scored at 17 with a Seven of Diamonds and a King of Clubs. Finally, Larry concluded his first gambling session by winning big with a hand he didn't expect to win. He got a Five of Hearts and a Four of Clubs, while Veronica's visible card was a Six of Diamonds. He Doubled Down, and got a Four of Hearts, making his score a mere 13. He was a little nervous, because he had bet rather big on this hand. But then Veronica Hit two cards, an Ace of Hearts and a Nine of Diamonds, Busting. With that, Larry decided that he was satisfied for the time being.

"Good luck with that money, Larry, and with your lady-hunting," said Veronica sweetly.

"Thanks, said Larry. "You know, I think meeting you and your lifestyle just gave me a great idea. Wanna know what it is?"

"Sure, Larry," Veronica said, "but don't take too long; other people want to gamble too, you know."

"Okay," said Larry, "If I can become rich enough someday, I'd like to open my own private casino somewhere in Nevada. And I'm going to make sure that it has the best entertainment, the best lounges, and the best gift shops a swinger like me can give it. It'll be complete with Blackjack, Poker, Slot Machines, Roulette and Craps tables, and a Wheel of Fortune. But most of all, I want the gamblers and myself to be able to relax without confining clothes, so the casino is going to be clothing-optional. Players will be able to sit and relax in giant jacuzzis with floating tables for drinks and the game pieces and cards."

"Wow!" said Veronica, "That sounds hot! If that dream comes true, I'll have to visit it sometime. Maybe I'll bring my husband, too. Hell, maybe I could even get a job there."

"Maybe I can arrange that sometime, babe," Larry said. "You never know."

"Well, anyway, I have to get back to work," Veronica said, noticing a couple of people waiting impatiently for their turn at the Blackjack table. I'll see you later, Larry."

"Bye, Veronica," said Larry. And he left the casino for the time being to visit the disco, after finding a disco member card in an old ashtray in the next room of the Casino Hotel's ground floor.

Later, by the time he returned and won the maximum amount of money a gambler could win in that casino with three lucky Blackjacks and numerous dealer Busts, he felt like he could conquer anything, even if no lady was interested in being his girl at the time.


End file.
